Lords of Niflheim
by BUTTEREDROSIE
Summary: Lloyd Irving isn't quite as stupid as he seems. Breaks from canon after Tower of Salvation. Lloyd has to deal with demons, corrupt organizations, and strange relationships as he makes his way through the world. Features smart!powerful!Lloyd. EventualSlash
1. Prologue: Fall

Disclaimer: I do not own Tales of Symphonia, and I am not making any money from this story. A few lines in the second chapter are taken from the game script, but the rest is mine.

Lords of Niflheim

By BUTTEREDROSIE

Prologue: Fall

He watched himself plummeting down. His reflection in the mirror-like surface of the tower was screaming, but Lloyd felt strangely calm.

The attack had taken him by surprise, and instead of the brutal collision with the wall that he had been expecting, he had found himself tumbling out one of the wide tower windows.

Around him, familiar shadows congregated, whirling and hissing in his ears. Their sibilant voices coalesced into a single, incomprehensible wail. He realized that he must be in shock. As he plunged toward the great, black chasm below, he recalled the pivotal day on which he had first noticed his constant, shadowy companions.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: To b0x, my anonymous reviewer, does the prologue make more sense now? Thanks for your review! I often have trouble with the beginnings of my stories.


	2. Chapter one: Whispers

Disclaimer: I do not own Tales of Symphonia, and I am not making any money from this story. A few lines in the second chapter are taken from the game script, but the rest is mine.

Lords of Niflheim

By BUTTEREDROSIE

Chapter One: Whispers

I didn't love Dirk, especially not at first. All I knew was that I was lonely and that he was supposed to be the replacement for the parents I'd lost. He had never concealed my origins, so I've always known that he found my mother half dead beneath a cliff with me crying in her arms and my father nowhere to be found.

Being the only skilled dwarven craftsman around meant that Dirk was constantly swamped with jobs. He could afford to be selective, so he would only accept the most intricate and challenging of the commissions. Unfortunately, they were also the most time consuming. He could rarely spare time for entertaining a child. We lived too far away from Iselia for me to play with any of the village children very often, so my early childhood was a solitary one. The only time that I can remember in which he displayed a significant amount of interest in me was when he had been attempting to unlock the secrets of my mother's exsphere. He never figured out anything momentous, but I did end up with a key crest for it. I constantly wore the exsphere from then on, maybe out of some misplaced affection for my mother or a desire to feel connected to her.

On the sixth anniversary of the day Dirk found me (since we didn't know what my birthday was) I was swimming in the river with some of the villagers' children. My guardian had been too busy engraving an ornate statue to actually celebrate the date, but he allowed for me to meet with some friends. Inured to such inattention by then, I hadn't cared much about the lack of festivity.

It's strange, but even now, years later, my memory of the event remains shockingly clear, somehow exempt from the blurring effect of time. I had been splashing around in the slow moving river near Dirk's house (I never thought of it as home) with Colette and a few others when the shadows first made their presence known. Feeling daring, I swam further out than any of the others, toward the center of the river. I didn't spot the rapid until it had already caught me. I remember that no one noticed my predicament at first. Colette was the first one to let out a shriek upon realizing how quickly the waters were pulling me away downstream, spluttering and gasping for air.

This stands out in my memory as the first time I felt true, mortal terror. I had heard stories of foolish and disobedient children drowning in this very river, their bodies never recovered. Images of my own lifeless, blue corpse flashed across my mind as I struggled desperately against the current. The indomitable rapids tugged my clothes and limbs like arms, pulling me under the surface for ever increasing increments of time. It was just as I was rounding a bend near some overhanging trees that it happened. Somehow, miraculously, a huge limb of one of the trees broke and fell. One end of it was wedged immovably between two trunks, but the other splashed into the waters in front of me. I crashed into it and caught hold, dizzy with fear and coughing my lungs up.

As soon as I was able, I pulled myself along the branch, inch by strenuous inch. When I finally reached the bank, I collapsed against the mossy ground, panting and shaking with adrenaline. I had thought, for a fleeting moment right before the branch fell, that I had seen something moving in the shadows among the trees, but when I lifted my head to look for my possible savior, I was alone. My friends' frantic cries increasing in volume as they approached drove the matter from my mind, to be all but forgotten while I was rushed away by worried and chastising parents. At home, I received a stern rebuke from Dirk, but his statue's siren call made it short-lived.

That was first of many appearances of a subtle, seemingly benevolent force in my life. It re-emerged to protect me from harm and aid me in small, barely noticeable ways. I even began to think that I had a guardian angel, perhaps my mother's spirit, looking out for me. As I grew older, my phantasmal protector involved itself in my daily life more and more. I began to notice the strange, moving shadows around me, reinforcing the apparition that I thought I had seen at the river. No one but me seemed able to perceive the shadows, something which pleased me immensely. For the first time, I felt loved and watched over. I had something of my own, a guardian whose attention was entirely focused on me.

It was a year until they first spoke to me. I was sitting against the trunk of a tall oak tree behind the house, watching drowsily through half-lidded eyes as the shadows swirled sluggishly around me. I had gotten used to their nearly opaque forms and the faint hissing I sometimes thought I heard. I was nearly asleep when the whispers started, almost too faint to be audible. At first the breathy voices didn't register in my lethargic mind, but they grew steadily louder and louder until the words were discernable.

"_Lloyd…"_ It sounded like a thousand different voices combined speaking in the same soft, cajoling tone. _"Come with us, Lloyd. What ties you to this place? You have no family, no loved ones here. To the villagers you will always be an outsider and an orphan. Would any of them even notice if you left?"_

By this point I was entirely awake and staring wide-eyed at the languidly moving shadows before me, slightly fearful. After all, hadn't the Pastor just been preaching to us about demons and their insidious ways of tempting people to sin? But what the shadows were saying was right…

"_Come with us! We can give you love and power and a place to call home. Everything you desire will be at your fingertips!"_

Feeling guilty, I averted my eyes and mumbled, "Please go away. I'm not supposed to talk to you…"

"_Oh you poor child… You have so much potential in you. You are wasted here. We can teach you how to achieve greatness…"_

I shifted uneasily. My enigmatic companions had never behaved in any way that seemed evil or sinful, and they had never harmed me, but something about the situation just didn't feel right.

When I failed to respond, the voices reverted to unintelligible murmurs, seemingly conversing among themselves. I hastily got to my feet and went back to the house, silently reaffirming my decision to never inform anyone about the mysterious shadows that followed me and whispered in my ear.

Things continued in pretty much the same manner as before, the shadows my constant companions, slowly weakening my resolve with their relentless coaxing. It wasn't until I was twelve that I got a glimpse of their true nature.

That was the year in which I began my martial training in earnest. Dirk, in a rare display of consideration, had made me two wooden katanas. I carried them around with me everywhere and even persuaded one of the few town guards to teach me. It gave me something to focus on, and the shadows were strangely helpful. They gave me advice about how to clear my mind draw out the powers of the exsphere to improve myself. Thanks to their influence and some amount of natural talent, I quickly became familiar with my weapons. I spent every spare moment practicing katas or hunting small monsters in the woods.

That was also the year when Genis and Professor Sage came to Iselia. We hadn't had a school before then, and all of the parents quickly seized upon the opportunity to get their kids out of the way by enrolling them. The Professor taught reading and writing to those who didn't yet know how, as well as math and the history of Sylvarant. She was considered invaluable to the village, and the Mayor even proposed the construction of a separate schoolhouse for her to show his favor.

I was walking back from the grocery store after class one day when I heard voices coming from behind the Mayor's house. Recognizing the shrill, penetrating voice of the Mayor's daughter, I snuck closer to investigate. I peered around the corner of the house, my bag of groceries clutched close to my chest, and caught sight of Colette's hunched form. She was sniffling softly and staring at the ground as the other girl sneered at her.

"Stupid Colette! What did you ever do to deserve the title of Chosen? I'm twice as good at everything but Daddy still pays more attention to you! I hate you!" I could see Colette's shoulders shaking.

I was enraged. Out of all of us children, Colette was indisputably the sweetest and most friendly. If anyone deserved the honor of being the Chosen, it was her. What right did that brat have to pester her with petty jealousies?!

I knew that Colette would never try to protect herself from this girl, so I rushed out of my hiding place, startling them both.

"Leave her alone!" I yelled, brandishing a carton of milk menacingly.

Unwilling to face any real opposition, the Mayor's daughter fled. I scoffed at her cowardice and turned back to my friend. "Are you alright?" I asked, trying to make my voice as gentle as possible.

"Y-yeah… I'm fine. She was just talking to me…"

I looked at her in disbelief. "It looked like more than just talking from where I was standing."

She blushed and looked away before quietly saying, "Thanks, Lloyd."

I put as much warmth into my smile as I could and then offered to walk her home. Colette was like a little sister to me. She was one of the few villagers to never treat me like an outsider, and consequently one the few who I felt any actual loyalty to.

I got cuffed on the ear for getting home late, but I went to sleep that night with a smile and a warm feeling. I decided that I liked protecting Colette. It was nice to be useful.

It became clear in the following weeks that despite my efforts, the Mayor's daughter persisted in her tormenting of Colette. I immediately launched a retaliatory campaign, with the shadows' help. They made it easy to strike back against the girl in minor ways, like sabotaging her test answers and confusing her by misplacing belongings. And the best part was that my connection to her problems was untraceable. I always had an alibi.

Professor Sage had taken the class was on a rock climbing field trip when the contention came to a head. Almost everyone was already halfway up the side of the cliff we were scaling before Colette even left the ground. Her ropes were all firmly attached, but she remained at the base of the rocky wall, staring up in terror. Once she had finally gathered her courage and begun the ascent, the Mayor's daughter leaned over to Colette's rope and snapped it loudly against the rock, yelling "Look out! Your rope broke!"

Colette screamed and fell back to the ground as her antagonist shrieked with malicious laughter.

I narrowed my eyes at the despicable girl and seethed with anger. Desensitized to their presence by then, I didn't notice the approach of one of my shadowy companions until it began whispering softly.

"_Look at that_ _loathsome child… she'll get what she deserves. The chit had better be looking to her own rope. See how close it is? Quickly now, use your boot knife. All you have to do is reach over, and you'll be able to put an end to this annoyance for good."_

I froze, horrified and disbelieving. "No!" I hissed back. "What the hell?!"

"_What's wrong? This is the perfect opportunity, while all the attention is on your friend. Don't you want to protect her? At this rate, you'll never be strong enough to defend her on her journey as Chosen."_

"Just shut up! She's just a girl! I'm not going to hurt her!"

"_Fine. If you won't, then I will."_

I felt my chest constrict in horror as the shadows flowed away from me and darted toward the still-laughing girl's safety line. I tried to scream a warning, but choked on the words because I was too late and everyone was shocked silent as she tumbled toward the ground, her rope snapping uselessly behind her.

The Mayor's daughter was fine, her worst injury being a fractured wrist, and the entire incident was labeled a freak accident or some sort of karmic retribution for the prank she had played on the Chosen.

But I knew the truth, and returned home that day shaking and disillusioned. The spirits that had haunted me for half my life actually were the demons that we had been warned so gravely about. They had put on an attractive mask at first, seeming to be benevolent and devoted to me, but their true face was finally showing through.

I was terrified. If my friends and the other villagers found out that I had been speaking to demons for years, they would drive me out. They already mistrusted me for being an outsider, but for this offense they might even kill me. I couldn't count on Dirk to protect me.

When the shadows tried to speak to me again, I covered my ears and pretended they weren't there.

I began to act twice as good-natured and simple around people, frantically hoping that if I was thought to be sufficiently stupid and idealistic, no one would possibly suspect me of consorting with fiends. I threw myself wholeheartedly into my new role, quickly forming a trio with Colette and the Professor's little brother, Genis. I allowed him to be the smart one of the group so that I could appear even more dim-witted in comparison. I deliberately did poorly in classes and cultivated my façade of laziness and academic apathy.

I found that if I concentrated hard enough on the people around me, and strove to ignore the spirits that shadowed my steps, I could hear their voices less clearly. Realizing the futility, they spoke less and less often to me, and eventually stopped altogether.

The only one of my habits that I maintained was my swordsmanship, though it was difficult to learn it all on my own, without any input from the demons. I was still resolved to follow Colette and aid her on her journey one day.

In the end, the shadows seemed to recognize their complete loss of influence over me, and they faded quietly into the background. They were always present, somewhere, but I saw them less frequently. As I grew older, they disappeared for ever increasing periods of time, though they never seemed to give up on me entirely.

Finally, around my sixteenth birthday, I began to hope that they had abandoned me for the last time. It had been over a month since I had last noticed their presence. I was quite comfortable with my role by then, too accustomed to playing the dim-but-loyal friend to ever consider dropping the act. I guess that my public persona had become a part of me, on some level. That's not to say that I was even remotely as stupid as I acted, but I think that if you pretend to be something for long enough, it begins to seep into you, and the act stops being quite as fake as it was in the beginning.

I was happy. My sword skills were the best they'd ever been; Colette, Genis, and I were unbreakable; and I was enjoying pretending not to learn the lessons Professor Sage taught us.

By the time I was seventeen and Colette was called upon by the Oracle, I had finally almost forced myself to forget about the shadows that had haunted my every action for most of my life.


	3. Chapter Two: Exile

Disclaimer: I do not own Tales of Symphonia, and I am not making any money from this story. A few lines in the second chapter are taken from the game script, but the rest is mine.

Lords of Niflheim

By BUTTEREDROSIE

Chapter Two: Exile

Fear and hatred were the predominant emotions on their faces. They lashed out at me like a pack of wild animals, blaming the weak one; the outsider. I saw guilt on a few faces as I scanned the crowd of accusatory villagers, but I knew none of them would champion me. Genis was the only one who stood by me. I wonder: if he had known of my deception, would he still have acted as he did?

I turned silently away from them. "Come on Genis."

As I walked away through the heavy rain, I tried to ignore the uncomfortable, tight feeling in my chest. I reminded myself of the constant narrow-mindedness I'd had to deal with, and tried to forget hours spent in Phaidra's sun-kissed gardens, picking overripe berries for her famous pies and playing with Colette.

Genis caught up with me just outside the town gates, and stared up at me imploringly. There was something terribly young in his hopeful blue eyes. I was jarringly reminded that he was only twelve years old; the same age as me when my life was turned upside down. The parallel made me weary.

"…I'll follow you, Lloyd. It's my fault that you were banished. So I promise to stick by you, always." He looked more determined than I'd ever seen him before. He had always been intelligent, but I suspected that this journey would demand much more than just intellect. We would neither of us survive it unchanged.

I nodded at him jerkily, and we began the long trek to Triet Desert.

Traveling with Genis proved to be easier than I had anticipated. I had to make surprisingly few obtuse remarks to maintain my image. It seems that once someone judges you and comes to expect a certain type of behavior, it takes quite a lot to change their mind. I was able to relax and concentrate on defeating the monsters we encountered along the way.

Genis was significantly weaker than me, and he was primarily a spell caster, so the brunt of the fighting was left to me. I was unable to deal with too many opponents and defend him simultaneously, so we were forced to flee any battles where we were too outnumbered. It meant that we had to take some lengthy detours to avoid large groups of foes, and our journey consequently took longer. But I was fairly confident that we would catch up with Colette and the others somewhere in the desert, either before they dealt with the Seal of Fire or after.

Despite our slow progress, I was content. To tell the truth, I wasn't looking forward to having to be on constant guard about my mannerisms once again. Genis expected me to be completely and unthinkingly honest with him, and he had barely known me before my decision to act like an idiot. There was little danger of him suspecting me to be more than I appeared. Raine, though not blinded by friendship, was much the same. And Colette believed too much in the inherent benevolence and integrity of humanity to have doubts about anyone, least of all a trusted friend.

Kratos was another matter, entirely. There was something harsh and discerning about the man that I had noticed from the beginning. He acted indifferent, as though his sole motivation really was the money, but I suspected differently. His eyes were cold and resolute when he thought no was looking. I was as wary of him as I was admiring.

Everything about him screamed strength and intensity. His eyes constantly scanned his surroundings for potential threats, and his every move was as graceful and measured as those of some predatory beast. In battle and outside of it, he wasted no movement. Even while reading or performing some other mundane task, there was a quiet precision to his actions that I found impossible to imitate.

True, I hadn't seen much of him before he left with Colette on their journey, but I was confident that if anyone were to discover my hidden depths, it would be him.

So we continued on our way to the desert, and I carefully hid my conflicting feelings of anticipation and anxiety.

We reached the oasis town in Triet Desert exhausted and overheated. Unfortunately, we were deprived of a chance to rest by the unwelcome sight of Desians. Somehow, news of my actions opposing the Iselian human ranch had already arrived before us. The Desians issued a warrant for my capture and posted a wanted poster. I was just relieved that Genis had apparently escaped their wrath and retribution.

Once the coast was clear, I led my friend over to examine the poster.

"Is this the wanted poster?" He asked, amused.

I scrutinized the crude drawing closely. "…Am I this ugly?"

"It's good. They'll never find you with this…I think."

"Only the outfit is recognizable. I should be fine if I just find something a little less conspicuous to wear." I gestured at my flamboyant red garb to illustrate.

"But your dad made those for you..."

Apparently, sentiment could trump prudence for the young mage sometimes. Or maybe I was being too harsh. My quick decision to discard one of my most visible ties to home was perhaps a 

bit uncharacteristic. I hadn't made a mistake like that in while. This journey was making me too comfortable.

But what I had said was true, and I wasn't willing to risk capture simply over this. Adopting a suitably mournful countenance, I replied, "I know. But I have to do whatever is necessary to survive this and get to Colette. I know Dad will understand."

Genis nodded reluctantly, and we hurried to the market to get something suitably unremarkable for me to wear.

I ended up dressed like a local in lightweight, baggy pants and a thin cotton vest over long sleeves to protect against the sun. Both were in light colors and much more comfortable in the oppressive desert heat, though I was slightly worried about the lack of armor. However, I hoped that the increased mobility offered by the garments would compensate.

The most popular topic of conversation among the townsfolk seemed to be the Chosen's recent presence. A few needlessly subtle questions led me to the knowledge that Colette was headed toward the Fire Seal somewhere in the desert.

"Lloyd, what do we do now? We can't search the entire desert until we find them."

I ran a hand through my dirty hair in frustration. "Well, we can't stay here. Someone is bound to recognize me despite the costume change. And I don't trust that no one here would inform the Desians.

"Yeah… we've really got to find them soon."

"Excuse me, but I couldn't help overhearing that you youngsters are trying to find some people?" I turned sharply to find an elderly man smiling genially at us.

"Yeah?" I answered cautiously. How much had he heard?

He offered a hand to be shaken and introduced himself. "I'm Hugh, one of the elders of this modest little town. If you're trying to locate somebody, the fortuneteller over by the oasis can probably be of service to you." His pleasant demeanor seemed genuine, so I found myself gradually relaxing.

"Thanks, Sir. We'll definitely check it out."

"Such a polite youngster!" he chuckled and wandered off, smiling absently.

I exchanged bemused glances with Genis. "Think the fortuneteller will be any help?"

"It's worth a try at least. It's not like we have any other leads."

I nodded my assent.

After a brief visit with the fortuneteller, in which we learned that Colette was headed toward some ruins not too far from away, we prepared to depart.

Genis stopped me near the town inn. "Don't you think we can rest a little longer before leaving? I'm pretty beat, Lloyd."

"Lloyd?" A gleeful voice rang out from behind me, and I turned to find myself confronting a group of heavily-armed Desians. "Wanted criminal Lloyd Irving? Excellent!" Their pudgy, whip-wielding leader cackled maniacally as he waved a doughy finger in my direction.

"Oh, no. I'm sorry Lloyd!" Genius sounded horrified.

"Don't worry about it," I reassured him tensely. I surreptitiously glanced around for an escape route, but the Desians were moving quickly to encircle us. I reluctantly drew my swords, uncomfortably aware of their superior numbers.

The leader drew in a breath, presumably in preparation for a gloating monologue, and I struck. Taking advantage of their surprise, I dropped low in front of the leader and launched a powerful kick to his legs, knocking him down and propelling myself toward another. I deflected my opponent's awkward swing of his staff and slashed at his chest.

The Desian staggered back to avoid my blade, and I followed, swords whirling. A rain of rapid blows later, I had dispatched that one and retreated to a defensive position in front of Genis, who had begun casting a spell.

The element of surprise was gone now, and we still had too many enemies to deal with. I adjusted my grip on my swords grimly and steeled myself. Two rushed me, and I leapt forward to meet them.

Moments later, I realized my mistake. The experienced Desians had succeeded in drawing me away from Genis and surrounding me. I was too busy frantically defending my front to notice the spell caster behind me. I felt a sudden, jarring impact to my back and fell forward. Shocks raced through my body, and I distantly realized that I must have been hit with some sort of lightning spell. As my vision receeded, I vaguely heard the sound of Genis' panicked voice pleading for mercy.

I came to in an immaculate holding cell somewhere deep in a Desian stronghold. My head was pounding and my limbs felt somewhat shaky. I dragged myself to my feet and leaned against the smooth wall unsteadily. After ascertaining that my weapons and supplies had been removed, I began to search for a way out. The cell was well constructed, and I imagined that the fortress was as impregnable from outside as it was from in here. I could hear the sounds of guards moving somewhere out of my range of vision.

Soft voices caught my attention

"…If so, I feel sorry for that Lloyd kid."

"Yeah. He can't possibly escape execution."

I heard the sounds of a new person approaching. "Hey, Lord Botta's calling you. I'll take over here."

The old guards clanked away, and I watched intently as the new Desian came into sight as he paced between the cells. An idea suddenly struck. The only thing that my captors had overlooked was the Sorceror's Ring. Obviously, they hadn't known it for what it was. I edged to the bars of my cell and waited intently.

The next time the guard passed in front of my cell, I thrust my arm between the bars and activated the ring. I watched in satisfaction as the burst of magical flame collided with the half-elf and he crumpled to the ground with a groan. Luckily, his unconscious form was close enough that I could reach out and drag him over. A quick search revealed a strange device with a glass panel and a series of buttons. I vaguely remembered Professor Sage mentioning something similar in one of her lectures, long ago. I messed with it until the screen lit up and a block of text reading 'emergency cell release? Confirm or deny' appeared. Immensely pleased, I pressed the button labeled 'confirm.' Moments later, the doors to all the cells swung soundlessly open.

I dropped the contraption atop the motionless guard and left the room. My equipment was conveniently stored nearby. I realized that the wooden swords I had been using up to this point would no longer be suitable if I was to be going up against soldiers. I found a couple of short swords leaning on a rack of other weapons along one wall and retrieved them. They were heavier than I was used to, and slightly out of balance with each other, but they would do. Fully armed and much more confident, I decided to attempt an escape. I had no idea where this compound even was, but I decided to worry about one thing at a time.

Just as I was reaching the door to the prison area, red lights began to flash and an alarm sounded. I tensed and cursed. My breakout had already been detected. I jerked the door open and raced through the hallway ahead, swords drawn.

I encountered very few Desians as I made my way through the sterile hallways, something I considered both fortunate and suspicious. My escape obviously wasn't unknown, so where were they?

My strength was flagging as I rounded a bend and caught sight of a large group of Desians ahead, discussing something. I held in a gasp of surprise and darted back the way I came, praying that I had avoided notice. Spotting a diverging hallway, I ran down it and pulled open the first door I came across. Once inside, I eased the door closed and leaned against it, panting softly with adrenaline and weariness.

Looking around, I found myself in an extravagantly ornamented set of rooms. It was the first place I had seen in the fortress so far that actually looked inhabitable, instead of painfully barren 

and pristine. It was filled with the same strange, foreign mechanisms as the rest of the compound, but at least here they were alongside a handsome mahogany desk and other furniture. There were even thick rugs on the floor and hangings on the walls.

I walked forward to examine the rooms further, tiredly hoping to find a map of the fortress with a big 'you are here' arrow and a highlighted escape route or something. Needless to say, I was disappointed.

"And just who the hell are you?"

I sighed and slowly turned to face the newest setback. A tall man with long azuline hair and a voluminous white cape stood close behind me. I stepped back startled: I hadn't heard him get that close. For an instant when my eyes met his, I was inexplicably reminded of Kratos before my mind snapped into gear.

I could see blue light crackling around his hands as he prepared a spell. I swore silently. The situation was starting to look dangerous, and I wasn't feeling too confident of my fighting ability in my current state of fatigue.

"Sorry, wrong room. I was just on my way out." I knew before the words even left my mouth that they were futile. The man's cerulean eyes looked me over sharply and riveted on my exsphere. I saw the conclusion form in his eyes as he examined it. Surprisingly, the magic swirling around his hands died out.

"You must be Lloyd Irving, the escaped prisoner. Unfortunately, this is the end of your little escapade. I'll ensure that you have more competent guards this time."

There was no way I had gotten this far, only to return to that damn cell! I lifted my swords into position and dropped into a crouch, gathering what energy I had left. I experienced distinct uneasiness as he inspected me with increased interest, making no move to launch an attack against me. A sudden smirk crossed his features.

"Hmm… I see the resemblance."

I narrowed my eyes at the indecipherable remark. However, before I was able to question him, the door I'd entered through slammed open, and a large, black-haired man with two guards entered. I recognized him immediately.

"Sir! We've received reports that the Chosen's group has infiltrated the facility!"

I stepped toward him, hatred giving me strength. "You're the Desian who attacked Iselia!"

He turned his attention to me, and a condescending sneer twisted his face. "So you're Lloyd! Now this is amusing!"

The blue-haired man strode to another door, snapping "Botta! I'm leaving for now. Our plans will be ruined if he sees me."

"What of the Chosen?"

"I'll leave that to you."

"Understood."

Before he left, the Desian leader sent one last, piercing glance at me and stated softly, "Until next time, Lloyd Irving."

Botta and the soldiers quickly moved to engage me, but the door behind them burst open once again, and I watched in relief as my friends flooded into the room behind them, weapons in hand. Genis had apparently found them safely and informed them about my situation.

"Lloyd!" My young friend called. "Are you alright?"

Kratos stepped to the frontlines, a promise of violence in his eyes as he assessed the opposition.

Botta drew an enormous sword from its resting place across his shoulders and smirked. "Perfect timing. I'll take care of everyone at once!"

Without further warning, he dashed toward me, obviously planning to pick me off while I was isolated and my friends were dealing with his guards. I, however, had no intention of letting that happen. I made as if to charge at him headfirst, only to change directions at the last moment when he assumed a defensive stance. I pelted past him to join up with the others, slashing one Desian's arm as I passed. The wounded man howled and dropped his blade to clutch the injured limb to his chest.

I wasn't sure how much help I would be in my current state, so I kept to defending the spell castors and let Kratos take the lead. When it became clear that we weren't going down easily, Botta stepped back and called a retreat.

"I underestimated your abilities." He flung his broken weapon to the ground and withdrew, the door slamming shut and locking behind him.

Kratos snorted and sheathed his sword before turning to face me. "Are you injured?"

I slowly put away my weapons and straightened with a slight wince. "Just tired," I replied.

He nodded. "Then let's get going. This isn't the place for discussion."

The entrance to the fortress turned out to be fairly nearby, which was fortuitous, for I wasn't sure how much longer I was going to last.

The march back through the desert to town passed in a blur of exhaustion, and I only abstractly recall learning that Genis had encountered them on their way back from the Seal of Fire and had updated them on what had happened in Iselia and Izoold. They had immediately set out to the Desian base to rescue me.

"Looks like we came just in time, too," he finished. "That Desian had you cornered."

Once we reached the Inn, we went straight to the largest of our rooms to talk. I collapsed face first on the closest bed with my feet sticking off the end. I drowsily heard Colette giggle from somewhere behind me.

"Lloyd!" Raine sounded exasperated. "We have things to discuss! You can sleep soon."

I groaned and pulled myself upright against the headboard, glowering at them all. Colette sat down lightly next to me and offered a smile. For the first time since my rescue, I really looked at her. There was a light in her eyes as she smiled up at me, and I could see the genuine pleasure she felt at having me with her. I felt the last traces of anxiety that I had about following her here melt away. Once again, she had managed to wordlessly reassure and console me simultaneously. I offered her a real smile, in response to which her face brightened even more.

I reached over and pulled her into a hug, stroking her hair with one hand. After a few seconds of silently absorbing her strength, I released her and turned to face the others, rejuvenated enough to get through the conversation.

Raine smiled at me, obviously softened somewhat by the display of affection. "Since it seems you and Genis have managed to get yourselves exiled, I suppose there is no other option but to take you with us. Just make sure that you don't hold Colette back. The World Regeneration is a serious task, not a field trip. Our main priority is always going to be releasing the seals."

Genis made a face at her from his position on another bed. "We know that! You've only been lecturing us about this for months now!"

"Yes, but not everyone pays attention in class." She cast a meaningful look in my direction, and I hastily constructed a repentant expression.

"Don't worry, Professor. I'll pull my own weight."

She sighed. "Very well then. Kratos, Colette? Do you agree with this course of action?"

Kratos didn't move from leaning against the wall, and simply said, "As the Chosen wishes."

"It's fine with me," Colette quickly confirmed. "Lloyd and Genis are really good fighters!"

I suddenly remembered something I'd seen in the Desian stronghold. "Hey Kratos? There were a bunch of Exspheres all around in that base. They were even embedded in some of the weapons. Do you know anything about that?"

He watched me silently for a few seconds before replying. "Why would you think I possess greater knowledge than the rest of you?"

"Well, you're the only one other than Genis and me who uses an Exsphere, and Genis doesn't know any more about them than I do."

Raine looked impressed with my observations, and I mentally rebuked myself for showing signs of intelligence.

"Humph. In essence, Exspheres are amplifiers that awaken our dormant capabilities. Many believe that they contain power, but that is not completely accurate. If you had no natural talent for magic whatsoever, and attempted to use an Exsphere to become proficient at it, you would not be able to. They simply allow us to access our untapped reserves of strength and power."

Raine looked utterly fascinated, and I had to admit that I was intrigued by his impromptu lecture as well. Besides, I think this was the most I'd ever heard him say at once. It seems that our enigmatic warrior has the makings of a professor.

Raine spoke up excitedly, "Could I learn to use one as well?"

Kratos shook his head. "You could feasibly learn to, but using Exspheres without a key crest to act as a dampener causes your body to react against the sudden onslaught of power. Humans who wear Exspheres for too long without a Key Crest end up mutating on a genetic level and turning into monsters."

I heard Genis gasp and knew that he too had been reminded of Marble. This must have been what happened to her!

Kratos continued speaking, ignoring our looks of horror. "What a Key Crest does is regulate the amount of power you can access until your body is capable of handling more. You have to use it constantly and accustom yourself to each new level of strength gradually before you can reach your full potential. But even with the limitations, Exspheres allow us humans to be a great deal stronger, and learn much faster, than we would without them."

Raine had been rummaging in a bag for a little while by then, and pulled something out with a triumphant exclamation. "Look at this! I picked it up outside the human ranch because it had angelic writing on it and took it with me!"

I immediately identified the glowing orange orb.

She handed the Exsphere eagerly to Kratos to examine. "The symbol on it is mostly worn off, but could we fix it?"

"Only the Dwarves possess the knowledge and skill to correctly carve the Key Crest into the ore."

Reluctantly, I raised a hand to draw their attention. "I can carve the thingy for you, if you like. Dad taught me some crafting techniques."

"Excellent!" She cried, snatching the sphere from Kratos and bounding over to me. "I'm sorry to trouble you with this. You don't have to finish it at once…" She trailed off, but I could see the barely restrained impatience in her expression and laughed softly.

"Don't worry about it, Professor. I'll have this all fixed up for you by morning. Genis can show you how to use it then."

"Thank you! I really do appreciate this!"

There was little else to be discussed, so Raine and Colette soon retired to their own room. I set up some candles in a corner of Kratos, Genis, and my room so as not to disturb the others and resigned myself to a long night of working on the Key Crest for Professor Sage. The process could not be rushed, for the danger of ruining one of the painstakingly intricate symbols I had to carve was high. I stiffly lowered myself to lean against the wall and got to work.

I noticed peripherally that Kratos has moved closer and had seated himself in a chair nearby, but was too absorbed in my efforts to pay him much heed. But I felt his eyes heavily on me through the night as I worked.

It must have been around midnight when I finally held the orb back and pronounced it satisfactory. Genis was snoring softly from his bed, but Kratos was still in the chair watching me, apparently too good for such mundane activities as sleeping. I straightened myself sorely and clambered to my feet, every muscle aching.

"You're quite skilled."

I started at the unexpected compliment and gaped slightly at the older man. His face was as inscrutable as ever. Shrugging the statement off, I nodded to him and exited the room to find the Professor.

Once I had dutifully delivered the Exsphere into her ecstatic hands, I returned to my room and collapsed atop the bed, fully clothed. I was unconscious before the mattress had stopped shaking from the impact of my landing.

The sound of a closing door roused me. Glancing around, I noted that it was still quite dark, probably not more than a couple hours since I'd fallen asleep. Kratos was nowhere to be seen, so I assumed that it had been his departure that had awoken me. I lay back and closed my eyes once again, but something kept me from sleep. I gave up after a few minutes: my mind was as buzzing and alert as my body was weary. I sighed and got up, deciding that as long as I was awake, I might as well find out what Kratos was up to. I glanced at Genis' sleeping form on my 

way to the door. He had burrowed completely under the covers and his snores had subsided a little. I smiled fondly and exited the room.

As soon as I left the inn I spotted Kratos standing by the stall in which Noishe was housed. I approached him quietly. I noticed a faint tensing in his shoulders and realized my mistake. "It's just me, Kratos," I called softly, so as not to startle the man into violent action.

He turned his head slightly, and I got a glimpse of his expressionless face. "Lloyd," he acknowledged.

Reassured that he wouldn't be acquainting me with the pointy end of his sword any time soon, I moved forward to lean against the wooden stable next to him. "Couldn't sleep?"

"I require very little." He looked at me directly this time. "What about you? I thought you were exhausted."

I didn't want to complain about his waking me up, so I settled for a shrug. "I can't seem to fall back asleep. I guess I'm still a little worked up from all the excitement earlier."

"You'd best get used to it. This was hardly the worst that we'll face on this journey."

I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. An unfortunate consequence of acting like an idiot was that people treated me like an idiot. Or maybe Kratos acted this superior with everyone. I suddenly noticed the intent, slightly strained look on his face as he stared at me. I felt myself stiffen reflexively at the attention. "What are looking at me like that for?"

"…Your swordsmanship is unrefined. You need to focus on increasing your agility and eliminating your vulnerabilities if your want to avoid becoming a liability for the rest of us."

"Then teach me."

He blinked. I had succeeded in surprising the unflappable warrior.

"If my skills aren't good enough, then teach me."

He was silent for a moment, then, "…very well. I will spar with you every night once we make camp and before dinner. Now, go to sleep if you don't want to be completely useless tomorrow."

I ignored his rude dismissal and pushed away from the stall. "Goodnight."

"…Goodnight, Lloyd."

I returned to my room, my body once again ready for slumber. As I got into bed, I reflected on the brief conversation. There was something he wasn't telling me; something hidden behind the strange looks and abrupt comments. I knew that I could figure it out if I just searched carefully enough. I fell asleep before completing the thought.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Does no one read Tales of Symphonia Fanfiction? Please review if you read this.


	4. Chapter Three: Salvation

Chapter Three: Revalations

Disclaimer: I do not own Tales of Symphonia, and I am not making any money from this story. A few lines in the second chapter are taken from the game script, but the rest is mine.

Lords of Niflheim

By BUTTEREDROSIE

Chapter Three: Revalations

"Wow, Raine! You did it!" Genis' voice was alarmingly gleeful. I managed to tear my gaze from the smoking remains of the Palmacosta Human Ranch to stare at him in disbelief.

"Yes, well, we had better get out of here and decide what to do next." Even Raine looked absurdly pleased with herself. I wasn't a pacifist by any stretch, but even this seemed a little callous of them. Or were they really that naïve? All of them, even Colette, seemed utterly unworried about the inevitable consequences of demolishing the human ranch in such a spectacular manner.

As our group headed out of the vicinity, I dropped back to walk by Professor Raine. "That was rather brutal of you."

She studied me. "As I said before, if we are going to be contesting the Desian supremacy over Sylvarant, we can't hold ourselves back. Don't tell me you're having second thoughts? Don't you remember what they did in Iselia and what they tried to do to the people of Palmacosta?"

"I'm not arguing with your reasoning, I'm just a little surprised. For people who are supposed to be saving lives and striving toward peace, we sure are causing a lot of death and destruction."

"We have to take action if we really plan to change anything. Hoping that we can make the Desians peaceably relinquish their human captives and cease hostilities against us without a fight is foolish and unrealistic. We have to be prepared for the inevitable aggressive actions that we will be forced to take. Very few successful revolutions ever took place without bloodshed."

I hesitated before replying. "All I'm saying is that the merriment you guys have been expressing in the wake of what we did seems a little morbid and presumptuous. How many people do you think died in that explosion? And I'm not just talking about half-elves. How can we be sure that all the humans imprisoned there got out safely? The only ones that we know escaped were the people who were recently abducted from the city. What about the people who had already been there? I strongly doubt that the Palmacosta Human Ranch had no humans in it prior to the recent influx."

I definitely had her attention now. She was staring at me as if she'd never seen me before; like maybe I wasn't as stupid as she'd thought. I knew it was a result of my words, but I made no move to remedy the situation. It had recently occurred to me that the sole reason that I had assumed my facade in the first place had been to avoid being ostracized from Iselia. I had been afraid of how they would react to knowing about the shadows. I had feared that I would become hated and ultimately forced out of the village.

But both of those had occurred anyway. Despite the shadows' disappearance, I had been cast out of my home without pity. What was the use of keeping up the act? The only thing that I now wanted to avoid was having Genis, Raine, and Colette realize that I had been deceiving them for so long. But it couldn't hurt for me to stop acting like quite so much of an idiot. They would most likely write it off as an effect of the journey. After all, it's not unusual for people to mature as a result of difficult experiences.

"What you're saying could be true, but I have to believe that what I did was the best possible option. By blowing up the ranch, I eliminated their stronghold in this area. That means that the people of Palmacosta can build up their city without fear, and can prepare themselves to fight back against the Desians when they return to reclaim this region. If any innocents died back there, they were tragic but necessary sacrifices for the future of Sylvarant."

I stared at her, completely blindsided. It wasn't naivety on Raine's part, it was pure utilitarianism. "Sacrifice for the greater good? I'm not sure I like that."

She looked at me sharply, her stride faltering for a second. I wondered what I had said to elicit the reaction. She shook her head slowly and sped up a little to rejoin the rest of the group.

As she passed me, I saw that her eyes were strangely sad as she murmured, "Then maybe you're on the wrong journey."

Walking alone behind the others, I pondered that cryptic statement. I couldn't help but feel that there was something going on here that I didn't know about.

I helped set up camp as quickly as I could, eager to follow Kratos for the day's sparring practice. I had to admit that learning from him was improving my swordsmanship in leaps and bounds. The man was a genius with three feet of sharpened steel in his hands. I never won a single match against him, and I still strongly suspected that he was holding back. I wondered how he had gotten so good when only looked a few years older than the Professor. Had he spent his entire life training?

I dropped my pack near Genis', deciding to set up my sleeping place later. Kratos' lessons had quickly become the favorite part of my days. There was something almost peaceful about letting myself fall into the rhythm of attacks and parries. I had never fought another human without the intent to disable or kill before, and it was more fun than I had anticipated. Not fearing for my life every second was a big bonus.

I arrived at the clearing he had pointed out earlier to find the older warrior already going through a set of warm-up exercises. The location he had picked was out of sight of the camp, though not so far that we wouldn't be able to hear trouble and return quickly. At first we had sparred at the campsites, but the others had gathered to watch us, calling out observations and jokes. Their commentary, though not maliciously intended, had distracted and irritated me. I didn't say anything about it, but I think Kratos noticed anyway, because the next day he led me to a somewhat more secluded spot in which to practice.

I drew my own blades and began a set of simple attacks. It was best to start slow and work up to the more complicated techniques. Also, I had recently purchased new swords to replace the mismatched Desian weapons. It had taken awhile to acquire the new equipment due to the scarcity of weaponsmiths who catered to ambidextrous fighters.

But the wait had been worth it. My new swords were extremely lightweight and perfectly matched. I had gotten katanas, since they were the type I was most familiar with. I was curious to try out scimitars, but decided that I would have plenty of opportunities to experiment in the future when so much didn't depend on my competence.

I completed the simple katas and segwayed into a more intricate one. I worked my way in a narrow circle, jabbing high and low with my blades. I gradually increased my speed until my swords were a blur of glinting metal spinning around me. I was so engrossed in the movement that I didn't notice Kratos until his broadsword interrupted my rhythm. I could feel a smile stretching my lips as I turned my attention to the man.

We messed around a bit, feigning thrusts and avoiding engaging the other's blade for longer than a second. A sudden idea came to me, and I decided to try something new. The next time he thrust at me, I leapt forward to meet him, dropping to one knee under and slightly to the side of his blade. I slid one of my katanas along his sword to block it, simultaneously twisting my body up to swing my other sword toward his neck. I didn't hold any strength back, certain that he would be able to deflect the attack. Unsurprisingly, he did. His free hand grabbed my wrist, halting the path of my sword. He then jabbed the pommel of his heavy broadsword against my other hand, knocking the katana to the ground. In the blink of an eye, he twisted my arm behind my back and held his sword point to my neck.

"Concede."

"Ow. I concede."

He immediately released me, and I got to my feet, rubbing my wrists with a rueful smile. "I reiterate: ow."

I could see an answering smile tugging at his mouth as I retrieved my lost sword.

"That was a clever move."

"Still didn't come even close to working," I laughed and sheathed my weapons, following his example.

"That's because you need to remember that my sword isn't my only weapon. You formulated that attack on the assumption that I would be helpless once you had blocked my blade and moved in. You dismissed my unarmed hand as useless, and that was your undoing."

"And the pummel; I didn't expect you to hit me with that either."

He just raised an eyebrow and smirked.

At moments such as this, Kratos seemed softer. Not less powerful, just more relaxed. It was as if he walked around all day on edge, and you only realized how tense he was all the time once he finally got a chance to unwind. I was glad that he got something out of these sparring sessions as well. I knew that fighting an amateur like me couldn't be very challenging for him and I felt guilty sometimes.

He straightened up slightly and his expression resumed its usual blandness. I knew that it was time to return. With no small measure of reluctance, I accompanied him back to camp. I knew that he would have returned to his normal, distant self by the time our friends were in sight. I sighed inaudibly. I had become quite fond of the semblance of good humor that he showed in our matches. I shook my head at myself disgustedly. I was doing this to improve myself, not to become bosom buddies with Kratos. I enjoyed his company, sure, but I had to focus on advancing my skills. Colette's safety was at stake, not to mention Genis and the Professor's.

Just before rejoining the others, I stopped Kratos with a light touch to his arm. "Thank you for this."

I met his gaze seriously, and knew that he understood what I left unsaid.

"You're welcome."

The harsh sound of our labored breaths was loud in my ears. Our footsteps echoed in the smooth hallways as we ran; a harried cadence. The Asgard Human Ranch was far larger than the one in Palmacosta, and I feared we would be detected before we could activate the transporter to Kvar's room.

A dark haired woman ran gracefully beside me. She was Sheena Funjibayashi, mysterious ex-assassin and allegedly our newest ally. Despite the circumstances of our first meetings with her, I believed that her desire to help us now was genuine. She had been present when we had discovered the truth about Exspheres the last time we were here, and had been just as horrified as the rest of us. Our current mission wasn't about the Chosen or the World Regeneration. It was about striking back at the monsters who could so ruthlessly disregard human lives.

We raced around a corner, only to be confronted with a gate lowering to block the path.

"They're cutting us off!" Genis' voice was panicked.

I growled under my breath and put on a burst of speed, dropping to the ground in front of the gate and sliding through the gap. I jumped to my feet on the other side and turned back just in time to watch the gate move to blockade the last few inches.

"Lloyd!" Their voices were muffled through the thick metal.

"Lloyd! Can you hear me?"

"Don't worry, Professor," I called. "I'll deactivate the switch on this side and find a way to meet up with you. Go find the other one!"

"But we can't leave you here alone!"

I shifted in frustration. I loved Colette, but there wasn't time for this. "Don't worry about me! Now, go!"

Without waiting for an answer, I ran off down the corridor, keeping a wary watch for enemies. I experienced a disconcerting feeling of deja vu as I dashed through the building. Were all Desian bases designed to look exactly the same? I was so disoriented by the identical passages that I had no idea if I was still even going in the right direction. After a few minutes, I observed that the corridor was widening, and the walls had metal lines running across them in an unfamiliar pattern.

The hallway abruptly led into a massive chamber. My steps slowed against my will as I stared around in horror. Countless rows of tanks filled with viscous blue liquid filled the room. In each tank a nude human body floated. Thin tubes were inserted down their throats and into the veins on their arms.

We had discovered earlier that Exspheres were made using humans as incubators, but I had never imagined anything this vile. I tried frantically to quell my nausea and tear my eyes from the abomination before me. I had a task to do! Colette and the others were counting on me; I had to pull myself together.

A haughty voice rang out, shocking me from my stupor. "Exquisite, aren't they?"

Lord Kvar stalked into view from behind a tank, an arrogant sneer on his sharp features as he surveyed the girl within it dispassionately. A long staff with a deadly metal point was held loosely in his right hand.

"They're revolting," I spat, drawing both swords in one smooth movement.

"A superb example of Desian technology, though far from the most impressive." He finally turned to face me. "That would be what you have so kindly brought to me."

I scowled and bit out a reply. "My Exsphere, yes, you told me last time. But I have no interest in trading words with a disgusting man like you. I can never make you suffer enough for the pain you have caused."

His mocking laugh pierced my ears like shards of ice, cold and sharp. "You, boy? I'd like to see you try!"

"You like the sound of your own voice too much. Enough!"

I loped toward him slowly, cautious despite my anger. It was well that I was, for three flying robots of some sort dropped down from the ceiling to hover in front of him, electricity crackling around them. I definitely didn't want to come into contact with those.

Still smirking infuriatingly, Kvar pointed his staff at me. "Come show me the power of that Exsphere!" he taunted.

Deciding to oblige him, I concentrated on the blue stone on my hand. The power immediately awoke to my call, rising up in a familiar flood. Strength flowed through my limbs, and I took off toward the half-elf in a flash. A single swipe sent his closed guardian careening into a tank nearby, cracking the glass. Another few steps and I was directly in front of him, hammering blows against his staff. I grinned maliciously as he was driven back by the force of my attack. A sudden tingle down my spine warned me in time to leap away and avoid a blast of electricity from the remaining two robots. My swords were glowing with the power from my Exsphere as I raced toward the distracting enemies.

The battle was exhausting. I danced between the three foes, never able to ignore the others long enough to dispatch any one. The strength from the Exsphere kept me fleet enough to keep up the pace, but by the time I managed to score a disabling hit on one of the remaining drones, my energy was flagging.

Kvar lunged toward me with a sudden movement that almost made me stagger. I tried to step away, but felt my back hit something solid. A blast of energy caught me in the chest, and I stumbled to my knees, shaking uncontrollably as currents of electricity raced through my body. Then Kvar's staff collided with the side of my head, knocking me to the floor. I coughed and tried to force my limbs to work, but it was as if my brain had been separated from my body, leaving me helpless, incapable of defending myself.

"Is that really all? I suppose I shouldn't have expected any better from a pathetic little human."

He kicked me onto my back and stared down at my shuddering form in disappointment.

"B-bastard…" I forced out between clenched teeth. Was I really this weak: unable to defend myself without my friends even this once?

Kvar sighed and raised his staff over me. "You've outlived your entertainment value. Die now."

I stared transfixed as my death rushed down toward me, unable to comprehend my failure. The razor point of the staff glinted in the poor light, mocking my inadequacy, racing ever closer only to disappear in an explosion before reaching its target. I watched in shock as Kvar's eyes widened, and then a familiar sword was sliding effortlessly into his chest. My salvation was a tall man with cold eyes and deadly precision. Kratos placed a boot against the half-elf's chest and roughly shoved him off his sword with a sickening, meaty sound.

Then he was kneeling beside me, eyes systematically cataloguing my injures. I numbly noticed that he hadn't cleaned the dark blood from his sword yet. Wasn't that important?

I lost track of time for a while then. When awareness rushed back, I was confused to see Raine at my side in Kratos' place. Her eyes were closed and her staff held horizontally over me as soft green light flowed into me. With each passing second, I felt more and more aware.

Her eyes opened and she offered a slight smile. "Good, you're awake. Before you ask, you only lost consciousness for a few minutes. The shock you received from that drone was pretty powerful. It had damaged your nervous system, but I've fixed you up now. You may have slight bruising on your cheek, but it will go away in a few days at most."

I cleared my throat and sat up gingerly. "Thanks, Professor."

I looked around and saw Kvar's body lying crookedly in a pool of dark blood. Colette and Genis were looking around themselves at the tanks in disgust, but Sheena and Kratos were nowhere to be seen. Raine stood all the way up and offered a hand. I accepted and let her pull me to my feet.

"We should catch up with the others now. They went to search for some sort of control panel for these Exsphere machines."

I followed her silently with Genis and Colette. We met up with Kratos and Sheena in an adjoining room filled with machines attached to glass screens. They were doing something involving pressing a lot of buttons and pulling levers. I stood to the side mutely as Raine joined them.

At camp that night I sat huddled in my blanket, leaning against a rock. It had been after dark by the time we had gotten far enough from the ruins of the Asgard Human Ranch to feel comfortable camping. Kratos hadn't suggested a sparring match. Silence had reigned over all of us since leaving the ranch.

I pulled the thin blanket more tightly around my shoulders and stared at the ground. I felt someone sit down quietly beside me, and knew without looking that it was Colette. She leaned against my shoulder, but I seemed unable to return the gesture.

Raine had ascertained that there was no way to safely remove the humans from the tanks without killing them or causing their Exspheres to mutate the host bodies. So we had done the right thing. The thing that servered the greater good. After all, a blow of this magnitude was bound to be crippling to the Desians.

Sacrifices are inevitable.

I felt Genis sit down on my other side, effectively ensconcing me in the familiar warmth of my friends. I listened wordlessly as they began to speak.

"Remember Phaidra's pies? Her blackberry pies? We'd spend hours in the summer picking berries from those bushes by your house, Lloyd, just so she'd make those pies."

Collete squeezed my arm gently. "I wonder what they're all doing now."

I felt Genis hunch down. "I wonder if they've finished rebuilding…"

"I'm sure they don't blame you anymore!" She hurried to reassure us, in typical Colette fashion. "They were just upset and afraid at first. When we go back, I just know they'll accept you back into the village."

I spoke up for the first time since Raine had healed me. "I'm not going back to Iselia."

"What? What about your Dad?"

"Genis, I can't go back there now." I tried to make him understand. "That place is a relic from my childhood. I've seen so much now… I don't think that I could ever feel content in that same, narrow world."

I could tell that they didn't see just how surreal going back to that place would be for me. I pulled my blanket tighter yet, feeling achingly alone despite their proximity.

Colette suddenly rose to her feet and squared her narrow shoulders. When she turned to face us, there was determination in her eyes. "I _will_ save this world. I'll fix everything that's wrong and cruel and unfair about it! I'll get rid of the Desians and help everyone they've hurt! I love Sylvarant, and I love my friends. I'll make this world perfect so that nothing can hurt what I love ever again!"

I looked at her standing there, straight and unwavering, resolution etched across her face, and all I could feel was despair. Suffocating, cloying despair. Colette was so pure and righteous, taking on the world to protect that which she loved. No matter how I strove, my efforts always fell short. I had failed by letting Iselia be attacked and having to kill Marble. I had failed to rescue Chocolat from the Desians. I had failed to defeat Kvar, and Kratos had come to save me, _yet again_. I allegedly possessed a superior Exsphere, yet I wasn't even strong enough to defend the ones I loved. Would I always continue to fail?!

Colette and Genis returned to their own blankets eventually, but I stayed awake long into the night, watching the campfire embers die out.

The next morning, Sheena stood to make an announcement. "I know that I came here intending to kill Colette, and that makes it hard for you guys to trust me, but now that I've seen this world and all the suffering in it, I can't take away their only hope."

Raine considered her skeptically. "You mean: you won't attempt to assassinate Colette anymore?"

Sheena shook her head empathetically. "No. I believe that Colette will do what's best for both of the worlds.

Colette spoke up. "Of course. I'll ask lord Remiel what can be done the next time I see him. I know that the Goddess Martel could never have intended for this rivalry between the worlds to exist. There must be something we can do."

Sheena smiled warmly at the girl. "Thank you. I know you'll do your best."

We packed up camp in contemplative silence, each of us wondering how the situation could possibly be resolved. Desians, World Regeneration, and now the contention between the two worlds: the sheer amount of problems we were attempting to fix was mind boggling. I met Kratos' gaze from across the clearing. He had been even more aloof than usual since Sheena had joined us with knowledge about the true nature of the World Regeneration. Had the discovery really shocked him that badly? Somehow, I thought not. I decided against asking him. It was doubtful that he'd confide in me, anyway.

We had decided that the best thing we could do at the moment was continue the regeneration. Then the next time Colette broke a seal and Lord Remiel appeared she could ask him about Tethe'alla and the conflict over the mana supply. If we ran into any more human ranches along the way, we could decide whether or not to infiltrate them based on their level of security. Unfortunately, the Iselia Human Ranch was too far out of our way to conduct a rescue of Chocolat at this point. I didn't like it, but we would have to go back for her later. I only hoped that we could get there before she was imprisoned in one of those awful tanks.

The next seal was inside the lofty Tower of Mana, built in tribute to the Tower of Salvation. It was just across a bay from the Asgard Human Ranch. We circled around the inlet and approached the tower early in the day, determined to reach the seal as quickly as possible. Once inside, we had to split into two groups in order to reach the top. I found myself walking up a steep spiraling staircase with Sheena and Genis.

Bored, I turned to the summoner and decided to make an effort at conversation. "So what's Tethe'alla like?"

A proud smile lit her face. "It's very technologically advanced compared to here. We use magitechnology, for one thing."

Genis looked up in shock. "Really? That's amazing! It's all been lost over here!"

"That's because this world is in decline. You don't have access to enough mana to use magitechnology anymore." She laughed a little. "I must admit: I can't imagine living here. Everything is so primitive. Not that that's bad!" she hastened to add, concerned that we might be offended.

I laughed lightly. "Don't worry about it. I'm rather jealous myself. I keep trying to imagine what life is like on your side, but I bet that nothing I think of even comes close."

"Maybe when we talk to this Remiel guy and he gives us a solution to the mana problem we'll also find a way to connect the two worlds. Then you could come see Tethe'alla for yourself. I'm sure you guys would love it. Especially Raine. Her intellect really is wasted here. She could accomplish so much at the Imperial Research Academy."

"You keep mentioning that place. Do you work there?" I asked.

"Nope. I live in a secret village called Mizuho. We're autonomous from the rest of Tethe'alla. The only reason that I'm involved with the academy is because of my mission to kill Sylvarant's Chosen. Both the king and the leader of Mizuho had to agree that assassination was the best course of action before I was sent here. The monarchy and my village rarely work together because of differences of faith, but we came to a consensus in this matter."

"Differences of faith? Doesn't everyone believe in the church of Martel?"

"You'll find that power corrupts religious figures just as easily as it does the rest of humanity. We in Mizuho prefer to believe that religion is a personal affair, not something to be gilded and ornamented with meaningless ritual and pomp. We also don't base our entire lives around our faith, like the rest of Tethe'alla does. In matters of state, the Pope has the final say, more often than not. We don't like the thought of so much power resting in one man's hands."

"Hey Sheena? I've been wondering about something. Will you get in trouble for failing to assassinate Colette?"

Her expression turned troubled. "I really don't know. I just hope they'll understand once I explain what I've seen."

I felt bad for turning the conversation grim. I made an effort to change the subject. "You certainly seem to know a lot about politics," I observed.

She allowed herself to be diverted. "Yeah well, I didn't want to walk into this mission blind. And Mizuho promotes a high level of education for all its residents. How about you? What was your schooling like?"

Genis snickered loudly. I shot him a glare while I answered. "We didn't have a school in Iselia until five years ago when Genis and Professor Raine came. She started teaching us in exchange for a house in town for them to live in."

"My sister is really smart," Genis added. "She taught herself everything she knows."

"So you've only had five years of education?!" Sheena stared at me, aghast.

"Hey! Don't look at me like that. Not all of us grew up in high-tech hidden villages!"

"I can't believe that you just admitted to being an ignorant hick!" Genis cackled.

"Oh, shut up. We can't all be prodigies," I grumbled.

We lapsed into companionable silence and continued up the stairs. We met up with the others in a room at the top of the stairs. They stood in front of a glowing platform, apparently having been there for a while already.

"Sorry for the wait," I apologized, joining them in front of the transporter.

"Shall we continue?" Kratos suggested. Colette nodded firmly and led the way onto the platform.

The battle against the guardian of the seal was demanding. The horse-like creature used its massive, feathered wings to beat furious gusts of wind in our direction, knocking us off balance. Its hooves were hard as diamonds, and not at all pleasant to be kicked with. Worst of all was the untamed magic that swirled around it, lashing out indiscriminately. Kratos and I were in the frontlines, taking the brunt of the beast's attacks so that Colette and Genis could cast their spells unscathed. Kratos and I worked flawlessly together, innumerable sparring sessions causing us to be able to predict the other's moves and act in concert. We dashed to the monster side by side, working together seamlessly. Despite the guardian's strength, it stood little chance against our combined assault. We defeated the beast without complications, the victory restoring some of the self-confidence that I'd lost after being nearly killed in the Asgard Human Ranch. I felt smugly proud of Kratos and my unfaltering performance.

Colette began to pray at the altar, and we waited eagerly for Lord Remiel to arrive. I noticed Sheena looking tense as she stood at the back of our group. I wondered if she was trying to stay out of sight of the angel.

"Your journey has been long. You have done well to reach this far, Colette, the Chosen one!" Remiel's voice boomed.

"Thank you… Lord Remiel."

"You have taken yet another step down the path to becoming an angel, yet you seem anxious."

She looked up at him determinedly. This was the moment of truth. "Lord Remiel, I have learned recently about the existence of another world. I know that it competes with Sylvarant for the supply of mana, so that one world is always suffering while the other flourishes. Please, tell me what I can do!"

The angel's face was impassive as he gazed down at her. "All will be revealed once you have completed the angel transformation. The time of the World Regeneration is almost upon us. Rejoice! The path to Tower of Salvation is open!"

"Wait! Lord Remiel!"

"Go to the Tower of Salvation and offer your prayers of regeneration. Then, you will be able to climb the stairway of heaven and become a true angel. Make me proud, my daughter." Then he was gone.

"… I will," she said softly, then turned to face us. "I'm sorry, Sheena. Just wait a little longer, okay? He said that he'd tell me what to do at the Tower."

"It's fine," she replied, but I noticed the nervous edge to her voice.

I went to her and touched her shoulder. "Don't worry. We won't forget about Tethe'alla."

She gave me a tiny smile. "Thanks for the reassurance. I trust you guys."

I watched the sun sinking below the horizon, my feet dangling off the edge of the roof. The town of Hima was bathed in fiery orange light from the spectacular sunset, and I leaned back on my arms, closing my eyes to savor the soft warmth of the dying light on my skin. We had separated upon reaching the small outpost, each of us desiring time to think about what awaited us the following day. There was a strange feeling in the air. Remiel had told us to 'rejoice,' but the atmosphere was charged with trepidation. We had journeyed so far and for so long that it seemed odd to think that we had reached the end.

"Hey."

I opened my eyes to the sight of Sheena standing over me. She dropped down to sit beside me and leaned back as well.

"Gorgeous sunset," she remarked.

"Yeah." I decided that sharing my thoughts with another person might help. "Hey, Sheena? What do you think will happen once Colette becomes an angel?"

"I hope that she'll be able to do something for Tethe'alla of course, but that's not what you meant, is it?"

I sighed; a long expulsion of air that did nothing to ease my anxiety. "I don't know why, but I feel like we're hanging on the edge of something big right now."

"The world Regeneration _is _big."

"I can't explain it right," I said testily.

"No, I know what you're trying to say. I didn't train these ninja instincts for nothing. Something's coming. I just don't know what we can do about it, or if we should even try."

"I'm glad it's not just me, then."

She smiled at me and punched my shoulder teasingly. After a few moments, she spoke up again, quietly. "I don't know why, but talking to you, even about inconsequential stuff, makes me feel better. I guess you're just a soothing person to be around."

I was floored. "Me? Are you sure you don't mean Colette? I'm the loud, immature one, remember?"

She looked surprised. "Immature? From what I've seen, you can be rash and emotional sometimes, especially when it comes to the Desians, but you're not immature."

"There're more than a couple of people nearby who'd be quick to argue that point," I laughed.

"They don't see you very clearly, then, do they?" The look she sent me was shrewd.

I gave her an innocent grin, strangely pleased. "_Any_way. I was wondering if we'll still travel together afterwards. This whole group, I mean. Kratos was only paid to guard Colette during the Regeneration, so I really don't know about him. I can't tell if he actually cares about the Human Ranches enough to help us strike back against them once this is over."

"Yeah," she agreed pensively, "he's a tough one to read. But I think he cares about you."

"Now I'm sure that you're seeing things!"

"No, seriously! He spends at least an hour with you _every day_ to spar. Do you really think he'd devote that much time to someone he didn't like at least a little bit? Even if it was just about improving your swordsmanship, a few days a week would be enough."

I stopped to think about it. She was right, of course, but I had avoided thinking about my relationship with Kratos in anything other than vague terms. He was a fellow member of our little entourage, and not an altogether disagreeable guy. He was also a swordsman, and practiced with me out of necessity. End of story. The thought him favoring me above the rest of our group was slightly unsettling.

I stayed on the roof with Sheena until the sun slipped completely out of sight. I left her silently, unwilling to disturb the meditative silence into which she'd fallen. I headed toward the entrance of the inn, hoping that I'd be able to get some sleep that night. I rounded the corner of the building and caught sight of none other than Kratos, leaning against the wall and watching the stars come out. I wondered if he'd been able to hear us talking on the roof. Feeling uncharacteristically shy, I planned to pass him without making an effort at conversation. But when I drew level with him, he held out a hand to halt me.

"Are you prepared for tomorrow?"

Not really feeling inclined toward chatting, I replied with a curt, "yes."

I started to walk once more, but again he stopped me. "Don't forget what I've told you. Strategy is key. You can't continue to allow your emotions to rule you in battle. If you're headstrong and overconfident it could cost you your life."

I was understandably startled. What had prompted this torrent of criticism and advice?

His intent gaze scorched into me, and I couldn't seem to tear my eyes from his.

"Don't throw your life away, Lloyd."

"What, exactly, are you trying to tell me?" I asked slowly.

"Exactly what I say. Be cautious, and chose your battles wisely. There are some fights that no one can win."

He finally released me from his stare, returning to his previous position against the wall. It was obviously a dismissal. Extremely troubled, I slowly entered the inn. As I closed the door behind me, I caught movement out of the corner of my eye. I whirled to face it, heart pounding. Raine stood a few feet away, something akin to disappointment on her face. I inwardly cursed my paranoia and tried to calm myself.

"Colette wanted to see you, but she's asleep now."

Something about her tone made me feel as if I should be apologizing. I restrained myself, wondering why everyone was acting so strangely today. "I'll talk to her in the morning, then."

"Where were you?"

"I was talking to Sheena for most of the time. Why?"

Her disapproving expression only intensified. "I see," she said simply. Then she left without a further word.

Mystified, I retreated to my bed, hoping for sleep.

I rode with Sheena to the Tower of Salvation. Her hands on my shoulders were soft and very warm despite the chill wind that cut into us with every beat of the dragon's wings. Her solid presence at my back helped slightly to alleviate the dread I felt weighing me down.

Then there was betrayal, and with it disillusionment. I felt everything spinning out my control as I stared helplessly into Kratos' glacial eyes, more foreign and unreachable than I'd ever seen them. A thousand denials screamed in my head, but all I could utter was a disbelieving, 'no.'

We had been fooled from the beginning. I had stupidly thought that I was the master of deception, but now I saw that my childish game paled before _him_. My friend, my mentor, my companion, had played me from the start. And now Colette –_Colette- _was lost to me. He r dead, empty eyes stared unblinkingly before her. I had _so stupidly_ gone on about what we'd do after the world regeneration, and _no one had told me that it was a fucking suicide mission!_

There was something wrong with me. I could see Kratos' lips moving, and I knew that Genis and Raine and Sheena were arguing with him desperately, but all I could hear was a deafening howl. Kratos drew that familiar, blood-stained blade, and I mechanically responded in kind, the action unconscious from countless hours of sparring. Every meeting of our swords sent vibrations through my bones, jarring them. We fought Remiel, and Kratos, and Yggdrasil, but it was just too much, and we hadn't stood a chance in the first place. _There are some fights that no one can win_. Suddenly enraged, I landed a blow against Yggdrasil's conjured barrier that shattered it in an explosion of sparks. I saw his eyes widen fractionally, and knew the second he began to consider me a threat.

Unwilling to allow the battle to continue any longer, the leader of Cruxis and the Desians suddenly swung an arm toward me. A ray of white light caught me full in the chest, throwing me back. Instead of colliding with the wall, though, I felt the edge of one of the wide windows scrape my shoulder as I tumbled through. The last thing I saw was Kratos' wide, unexplainably panicked eyes before I was freefalling, the wind howling furiously in my ears.

From every direction, inky black shadows raced to encircle me. The faithful, long-absent shadows had never truly left me at all. A multitude of voices rang out around me in unison, shrieking bargains and remonstrations.

"_We told you, stubborn boy!"_

"_You aren't strong enough alone! You need the power we can give you!"_

"_You'll never be able to save the Chosen and achieve vengeance on that traitor without our help!"_

"_We can give you what you need!"_

I was more than halfway to the ground now, and the shadows were frantically swarming around me, apparently powerless to do anything. I could feel blood seeping from the wide wound across my chest, soaking through my clothes.

"Tell me… what to do…" I coughed.

The multitude of voices fell silent, then a single one spoke up. "_Agree to learn from us and work alongside us for two years of your life, and we will give you the power that you desire."_

As I fell into the great chasm at the base of the tower, I closed my eyes and weakly said, "I agree."

As I hit the ground, the shadows rushed into my body, thousands of voices laughing in triumph.


End file.
